If one were to imagine the conversation between SA Football Association (SAFA) management and the principal of Sandown High School, I suspect it would sound a little like this if one were to hear only’s SAFA’s side of the chat:
SAFA: Hello Mr…erm…Principal, this is SAFA. Listen, we’re having trouble finding a place for our national soccer team to train ahead of the World Cup, and so we’ve decided your school’s soccer fields will be it.
SAFA: Mr Principal, yes, that is what I’m saying… our beloved team, praised be its name, will be based on Grayston drive so we need your fields to practice on.
SAFA: errm, well, yes, we *were* going to use the so-called high-performance Esselen Park facility but its….facing challenges right now.
SAFA: You know, challenges!!! No pool, no on-tap masseurs, no gold dust on our corn flakes. What does it matter, anyway? You should be happy that we’re spotlighting your school by setting up camp on your fields, so to speak. You will be able to say ‘I was there!’ when it’s over.
SAFA: What do you mean, ‘what about the pupils and their right to make use of school facilities’? Do you know who you’re talking to?? Did my boss not say that it was going to be ‘party, party, party’ when he took the helm? WERE YOU NOT LISTENING????? Where are we supposed to host our banquets if not your school hall? Where are Bafana players supposed to sneak marijuana cigarettes if not in the downstairs boys’ bathroom? Where’s your spirit, Mr … ahhh…Principal?
SAFA: I don’t see how your having to hold school classes would get in our way.
SAFA: Ohhhh, you mean the opposite? Listen, shut up, our minds are made up. There’s a McDonalds and a KFC in spitting distance from Sandown High School, and we’re not going to budge on this, you academic wanker. You’ve made me cross now. Because of this, I’m going to cancel Julius Malema’s planned motivational visit to the team and the matric girls. Good day!